the journey from the fool’s cap to the king’s crown

by yagyesha roy

cover photo by mathushaa sagthidas

and no matter

how much

i try 

to romanticize

it is

in its very essence

the opposite of 

beautiful

 

it is still breathtaking. 

but it is messy. 

and hurtful. 

and god, the pain. 

 

you hear about

the tragic deaths in the hudson 

accidents and not-so-accidents

falling bodies

meeting crashing waves 

 

but they don’t tell you

about

the tragic deaths inside bodies

emotions and thoughts

there

always there

but fading

 

you see

 

i call myself a king because 

modelled by Ryan Lanji

i was once the fool 

of the court

 

but i clawed my way to the top

picked up my broken pieces

stitched them back together

i learned to love myself

and set the crown atop my head.